How to not succeed at dating. Advice: to succeed at real romance (plan A), pursue friendship or backrub role (plan B), trick her into your agenda later. Like friendly guy secretly wanting sex, playing “just friends,” waiting to reveal desire—just to get rejected, friendzoned. Your dating story ends worse: time, emotional resources on plan B wasted; better invested in direct attraction (plan A). Awkward “we’ve been friends, but I want to bang you” kills trust.

Making it with plan B as hard as plan A. You run out of steam because no passion there. “Easy road” harder. Like skater interviews to sneak music: leave journalism to real journalists. Instead, make music video with skaters, soundtrack, t-shirts with band name, play live at parks, offer music to skate promo. Get involved authentically. Mix interests without hiding main goal. Dating same: don’t friendzone yourself hoping for sex later. Be direct about romantic intent from start.

People put you in roles, don’t expect change, don’t like change. Lose investment while transitioning. World pressures to stay put. Showing facade, hoping turn into “real you” later assumes rejection, screams shame, lack self-acceptance. Stinks; people run. Movie critic hiding music links has zero credibility vs guy shoving music in face. Dating: “nice guy” facade for sex later repels. Women smell inauthenticity. Be consistent: romantic interest first, friendship second.

Put main thing first: desire her romantically. Second thing second: friendship if mutual. Be consistent. Otherwise apologetic, contempt-worthy. Don’t sneak agenda; own it boldly. Women respect direct men over schemers. Friendzone backrubber reeks desperation; confident pursuer attracts. Invest passion where heart is—direct dates, not detours. Authenticity builds trust fast. Hiding kills vibe. Dating success demands upfront value, no tricks. Shine as you are, or fade in shadows.